This text was written by Christophe. Read more about him and the possible forms of therapy on his profile.
Female ejaculation is a bodily experience where after sexual stimulation (usually from the G-spot) a milky fluid is released from the yoni.
It is a phenomenon that is gradually becoming more known, but where there is still a lot of mystery and taboo surrounding it. You often hear about it in the context of erotica and porn, where they talk about squirting. Unfortunately, this gives a distorted picture, just as tantra (massage) itself is usually seen in that context in the west (read more). Squirting is also not strictly the same as ejaculating as it involves a more watery fluid that is secreted in greater amounts than ejaculate and also involves the bladder.
Also important to mention is that ejaculation and orgasm are separate from each other. Ejaculation is more of a physical release while an orgasm is the euphoric climax experienced after a build-up of sexual arousal or release of built-up sexual tension. Both can also be accompagnied by an emotional release.
The G-spot is an area that is internally located a few centimeters inward on the front wall of the yoni and almost always feels spongy or jagged. This complex structure includes the glands of Skene (also known as the female prostate) that play a key role in the formation of ejaculate. You can feel and stimulate the G-spot zone via a 'Come here' movement with your finger(s).
A vast majority of women are certainly able to ejaculate, but don't get to this point due to the fact that the right cocktail of physical stimulation and letting go mentally must be in place.
The physical stimulation usually takes place via the G-spot, but for some women it also works via clitoral stimulation or, more generally, by building up sufficient sexual tension. Every woman is unique and it's a matter of discovering the right combination of location, pressure and frequency while stimulating the G-spot.
Being able to let go mentally is at least an equally important factor and can stop the whole process of ejaculation, despite correct physical stimulation.
A first mental block that often returns is the feeling or urge to go to the toilet. If you have done this in advance (tip!), this is only about a feeling caused by pressure on the urethra and bladder via the stimulation. It is a barrier that you have to mentally go through. Sometimes the comparison is made with childbirth, in which waves of pushing and rest also alternate. To be clear, ejaculation is not accompanied by pain!
Another mental block can be the presence of shame. This is usually (and not so surprising) because the woman thinks that urine is being ejaculated. So informing yourself correctly about this can help to remove this blockage.
Once you have made that click as a woman, it is surprising how quickly you can come to the point of ejaculation again later on.
During a tantra massage you are invited as a recipient to step by step make more connection with your body and to be less present in your head/mind. This goes along with achieving deeper relaxation or even a state of complete letting go and surrender. But for many women (and men) it is not easy to reach such a state.
What I find, however, is that stimulation of the G-spot can sometimes drastically change this. The sexual energy, which is especially generated during the yoni massage, is very powerful and therefore it is not really surprising that this energy can take people out of their heads and somehow force them into their bodies.
In addition, the G-spot zone is connected to the pelvic nerve, which is strongly linked to our emotions. The entire pelvic floor region is an emotional repository for unprocessed stressors, traumas and emotions. Stimulation of the G-spot therefore very often brings these unprocessed emotions to the surface. Interesting to mention is that this can happen before, during or after possible ejaculation, which is completely in line with my experiences in practice. I have come to see stimulation of the G-spot more and more as a powerful tool to achieve an energetically profound tantra massage.
Ejaculating as a woman has always been a very controversial topic, and research is still going on. Some persistent claims such as the existence of the G-spot or that the ejaculate is nothing but urine, are now (virtually) a thing of the past.
Author: Christophe
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